When you no longer see the point to anything anymore, its a tough place to be, it feels like you are drowning. There’s that sinking feeling every day in the pit of your stomach, it means you feel you have lost your purpose, or a purpose that gave you a reason to keep going before. Sometimes you feel immobilized and have to force yourself to have dummy goals to get through each day, or you basically won’t do anything! Meanwhile, life demands that we show up, its unavoidable, so we go through the motions.
Grief and trauma often buries our heart’s purpose. For many, our purpose is to be a part of the life of someone they love. That’s a precious gift. If you lose that, you feel you lost the world. You do in fact lose all references to the world you were living in before, everything is different, there are no references. This isn’t a life you recognize yourself existing in. But here you are, and it kept getting worse after you lost the one you loved or after that deep trauma. Things become inconceivably surreal and changed forever.
There’s a detachment to it as it plays out, but you have to move along with it. You have one eye looking inside and one looking out. You aren’t sure if you’re going mad, or if the world has gone mad, or both. Times like these we have to let go of what we once knew. Try something new as that’s all we’ve got. Assimilate, find the stillness inside, create an anchor of love somewhere, even if you feel that was lost and everything is different. Just focus on that anchor, the tiniest amount of love in your life, focus on that, as that creates your new intention or purpose. Your anchor in the storm. Do this, even when its hard and don’t get too distracted or caught up in what you are seeing play before your eyes out there in the big theatre of the world during this healing process you have to stay anchored in the storm, so set intentions of what those little love anchors will be, they could be new people, or new places, pets, new friends, projects or jobs. What little moments of beauty or wonder spoke to you in that moment? What made you feel a subtle or even dull spark of joy or comfort, or inspired you even, if that is possible now?
We are in uncharted waters, we have no map, we are seeding the creations of a new kind of map, one that doesn’t use archaic systems but new approaches in the winter of empire wars. That’s a lot of pressure, some might feel overwhelmed, build your network of people, community is vital to nurture in what ever form its valuable. This is how adventures and new chapters start, sometimes with a wreck behind us, and the unknown ahead of us. It might seem bleak, its going to be a very difficult road, its scary because you don’t know what will happen. However, all you need to know is you are the map, so follow the compass of your intuition and heart.